Manatee Max's Useless News of the Day

Posted by Max on Mar 30, 2017

Today's edition of Manatee Max's Useless News of the Day brought to you by,...

In the news today, yesterday's sun set over Mallory Square in Key West to the cheers of throngs of excited onlookers. The sun did make its usual reappearance on schedule this morning over the eastern horizon and is currently making it's way west. We'll have more details as they develop.

Several cases of Déjà vu have been reported across the country. Doctors have no explanation for this inexplicable occurrence as of yet. However ADA spokesman Albie Coretuna said they'll be closer to discovering the cause after the back nine. If you believe you're experiencing Déjà vu see a witch doctor as soon as is practical.

Amber Jack of 4242 Carangidae Ave. Pompano Beach Florida won this week's Name that Movie With Just one Pixel contest when she correctly identified this enlarged pixel from the anchoring scene from the 1992 Touchstone film, 'Captain Ron.'

Several people guessed the gangrenous leg scene from "The Snows of Kilimanjaro" - a really great film created from Ernest Hemingway's short story of the same name, but if you notice, that pixel is just a slightly more eerie black. Great guesses from everyone. Thanks for playing.

And here's next week's pixel:

Good luck!

According to a report filed by The Federal Commission on Tastes, Flavors, Astringents and Piquancybananas are now considered to be 100% delicious and consumable in most peeled states. Attorneys for Chiquita declined comment saying only that they were told not to talk with their mouths full. However, Harry Belafonte, head of the Banana Boat Captains' Union 1072, had this to say on the subject.

....and, in our last story for today, several cases of Déjà vu have been reported across the country. Doctors have no explanation for this inexplicable occurrence as of yet. However ADA spokesman Albie Coretuna said they'll be closer to discovering the cause after the back nine. If you believe you're experiencing Déjà vu see a witch doctor as soon as is practical.